Negotiate Like a P.R.O.

Whether you're negotiating a peace settlement in a war-torn country or a peace settlement in an argument-ravaged relationship, strong preparation is the key to success.

The following three steps will help you establish the three keys to your preparation - why you are involved in the negotiation, how you intend to conduct the negotiation, and what are the specific outcomes you are hoping to agree upon.

1. Purpose

Knowing why you are engaged in a negotiation may seem obvious in some situations (to buy a lamp, to stop a fight, etc.), but more complex negotiations generally have more complex purposes.

Ask yourself:

-Why am I negotiating?

-What are the potential benefits?

-What do I ultimately hope to achieve?

2. Result/Relationship Balance

A "transaction" is high result/low relationship - we get what we want, and the other person is incidental to the exchange. Buying a used car is generally a "transaction".

"Relationship-builders" are meetings, calls, and exchanges of value where developing the relationship between the two parties is far more important than the actual tangible "result" outcome. Early meetings in any project are usually "relationship-builders" - what gets done is far less important than connections being made.

A true "Deal" is where there is a high emphasis on both getting what you want and enhancing your relationship for the future - this "win/win" thinking takes more time and effort, but is essential in any sort of long-term agreement. Successful political (and marital!) negotiations are always predicated on achieving this balance.

Give yourself the following test:

If you had 20 points to distribute between creating the Result you want and enhancing the Relationship, how would you do it?

Example (Result/Relationship):

15/5 - Transaction

5/15 - Relationship builder

10/10 - Deal

3. Outcomes and Options

When it comes to negotiation, having a clear outcome, goal, or target in mind has been shown to be one of the primary determinants in how things come out.

Ask yourself the following questions:

-What specifically do I want?

-What specifically do I think they want?

-What are some plausible options that will get us both what we want?

Bonus Tip: If you're using this to prepare for an important negotiation, take some extra time to answer the questions AS IF you were the other person in the negotiation. You will be pleasantly surprised at the insights you gain from this process.

Have fun, learn heaps, and the next time you negotiate, do it like a P.R.O.!

Michael Neill is a licensed Master Trainer of NLP and has written over 450 articles on in the areas of business success, money, relationships, health, happiness, well-being, and spirituality. His weekly coaching column is reprinted in newspapers and magazines throughout the world, and can be found online at http://www.geniuscatalyst.com

In The News:

Mastering Negotiation: Conquer the Enemy Within  Supply and Demand Chain Executive
How to haggle  EurekAlert
Pelosi's hostage negotiation  Daily Journal Online

While Youre Waiting

Not long ago, I made a partnership pitch, on behalf... Read More

Are You Scaring Away Potential Customers?

When you are trying to make a sale and ask... Read More

Managing the Sales Negotiation Process

How many times have you heard:"You've got to drop your... Read More

Communicating Across Time Horizons

There was a time in my life when I sold... Read More

Negotiating Technology Contracts

Have you ever tried to negotiate a deal for software,... Read More

Guidelines for Ambassador Appointments

Ambassadors to other countries are a vital part of international... Read More

Negotiating Skills: Ask For More Than You Expect To Get

It creates some negotiating room, and you might just get... Read More

Negotiations: The Art, Science, & Sport of Online Deals

Negotiations can seem as complex as physics, and in fact,... Read More

Negotiating: Forcing vs Compromising

Forcing is a hard-nosed approach that makes heavy demands from... Read More

Writing an RFP (Request for Proposal)

A while back, a potential client provided me... Read More

How To Deal With A Complainer

How To Deal With A ComplainerA Complainer Is Characterized by:1.... Read More

How To Communicate Using Space

What Is Proxemics?The study of the communicative aspects of personal... Read More

Negotiation: A Compromising Position

Negotiating is a hot topic these days for a good... Read More

Resolve Conflict In 6 Easy Steps - The BEDROL Method

The principles of Negotiation can work for you in any... Read More

Negotiating Tactics: Don?t Let ?Good Guy ? Bad Guy? Control the Sales Negotiation

Counter one of the classic negotiating gambits by addressing it... Read More

Four Ways To Work Out Business Disputes

Business owners have four options to resolve disputes with partners,... Read More

Business: Keys To Negotiating Well

Whether it's buying a car, asking for a pay rise,... Read More

The Six Rs for Changing MInds and Overcoming Resistance

This article borrows from Howard Gardner's book, "Changing Minds" (2004).... Read More

The Art of Haggling

Did you know that at one time in this country... Read More

Embarrassed To Discuss Your Prices? Seven Common Reasons We Cant Talk About Them

Last week, a wonderfully-skilled electrician installed a new light fixture... Read More

Negotiate Like a P.R.O.

Whether you're negotiating a peace settlement in a war-torn country... Read More

30 Tips for Keeping Meeting Expenses to a Minimum

Money makes the world go 'round. And when it comes... Read More

Cross Cultural Negotiations

Cross cultural negotiation is one of many specialized areas within... Read More

What Are The Four Types Of Negotiating Outcomes?

Negotiating outcomes are the types of results that can happen... Read More

Power Pricing - Getting the Right Price for Your Products and Services

There's an old joke about the New York City blackout.... Read More