Deprecated: mysql_connect(): The mysql extension is deprecated and will be removed in the future: use mysqli or PDO instead in /home/a26f9f83/public_html/articles/includes/config.php on line 159
Women and Bad Boys: What Is The Attraction? > NetSparsh - Viral Content you Love & Share

Women and Bad Boys: What Is The Attraction?

"Bad Boys".

If you're a woman, you may be saying "hmmm" as you hear these words. You know you shouldn't, but you just can't help yourself.

There is just SOMETHING about these guys that draws you in, even as your head tells you to "beware"!

So, what exactly is the attraction? It's not necessarily that they are more physically attractive or smarter or more successful than the "nice guys". In fact, they can have fewer of these qualities, yet be harder to resist.

So what is it? Let's begin by defining these guys. This term is generally applied to males who treat women poorly. Do these behaviors ring a bell?

*calling at 8:30 on a Saturday night to ask if you want to get together

*not showing up for a date- followed by no phone call or apology

*never having any money when you are out

* forgetting or ignoring your birthday and other important dates

*flirting openly with other women when you are together

*hitting on your good friend(s)

*making booty calls at 1am, after they've had a night out with others

*is doing time for a serious felony

Instead of asking "what is it about these guys"; let's instead examine what it is about the women who can't resist them. The following are actual statements from women who have a history of attraction to these guys. See if any of these sound familiar.

* "It's never BORING with him. He's unpredictable and exciting."

* "He's strong, aggressive and self-assured; I feel safe with him."

* "It's not his fault; he's trying to get his life together."

* "I haven't met anyone else that makes me feel the way he does."

* "He's so charming and passionate."

* "He tells me how much he likes me, so he must really feel something for me."

* "He needs me."

* "He doesn't come across as needy and desperate."

* "I can't believe I've attracted someone like him."

Now, on the face of these, they seem pretty benign. We all seek at least some of these traits in the men we choose. So, where's the problem?

Essentially it's in his inability to meet the woman's fundamental needs. She is the one doing all (or most) of the giving. The question then lies in; "what's in it for her?"

The answer can be found by exploring three basic issues:

*level of self-esteem

*capacity for intimacy

*roles that she has been in throughout her life

If a woman feels good about herself, she chooses a mate who communicates both verbally and non-verbally to her that she is valued and respected. She won't allow this other person to undermine her positive self-worth. She believes in her ability to participate in a healthy, reciprocal relationship.

If she doesn't feel good about herself, she chooses someone who reinforces her negative self-beliefs.

If a woman is capable of true intimacy, she is open to the true availability of the other person. She wants him to be a full and active participant in the relationship. She can allow herself to be open, vulnerable and able to take as well as to receive all that true intimacy offers.

If intimacy is difficult, she choose someone who is distant, hard to connect with and not emotionally and/or physically available.

If a woman has had a healthy role in her relationships since childhood, she will choose someone with whom she can continue this healthy interaction.

If a woman has been too long in the role of rescuer, caregiver or the one who sacrifices for the good of others, this will probably be the role she will seek out in her relationships.

Fortunately, most women fall somewhere in between on these issues. So the task is to evaluate yourself in each area and decide on a course of action that will help you to choose a "nice guy", who stirs your senses and meets your needs while being truly available for a real relationship.

Begin with an assessment of what you value most in life and cannot live without.

Go to http://www.consum-mate.com/newslets/02oct.htm for an article on "clarifying and living your values".

Once you know what is most important to you and believe that you are worthy of achieving it, you will have taken a giant step towards finding the right partner for you.

Toni Coleman, MSW is a licensed psychotherapist and relationship coach with over 20 years of experience. As a recognized expert, Toni has been quoted in many local and national publications including: The Chicago Tribune and The Orlando Sentinel newspapers and Family Circle, Woman's Day, and Star magazines. She has been featured on ABC News; Discovery Health Channel and AOL Online. As a weekly contributing commentator on the KTRS Radio Morning Show, (St. Louis, MO), Toni offers dating tips and relationship advice in response to listener feedback. Toni founded Consum-mate.com in 2002 to offer singles the knowledge and tools they need to find and sustain healthy, lasting love relationships. She is a member of The International Coach Federation, and The International Association Of Coaches.

In The News:

This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at https://news.google.com/news

Tribune-Review

Kennywood, Steelers partner for new attraction, record-breaking coaster
Tribune-Review
“Kennywood is a big tourist attraction for the Mon Valley, but it's a big economic generator,” Davis said. “It employs a lot of people who live in the district and the greater Mon Valley region. But adding this roller coaster and area only furthers the ...
Kennywood Park to build 'Steelers Country' themed land, new roller coaster with Pittsburgh SteelersAttractions Magazine
Kennywood Park plans record-setting coaster as part of a Steelers Country attractionThe Times

all 33 news articles »

The Drive

UPDATED: Sudden Storm Sinks Missouri Boating Attraction, Death Toll Rises to 17
The Drive
A flash weather event struck in southwestern Missouri on Thursday, leading to disaster for a local boating attraction and onboard tourists. Thursday afternoon, 31 passengers boarded a Ride the Ducks Branson tour boat and set out on Table Rock Lake.
'Mass casualty event' at Ride The Ducks attraction in Branson, MissouriKTTS
Branson, Missouri, tourist cheer marred by 'duck boat' tragedyReuters
17 dead after duck boat capsized on Table Rock LakeKansas City Star
INSIDER
all 1,000 news articles »

Bloomberg

Saudi Aramco's Strange Chemical Attraction
Bloomberg
Saudi Aramco's IPO may be on hold, but that doesn't mean its bankers are idle. It emerged on Thursday that the state-owned oil champion — full name: Saudi Arabian Oil Co. — is considering buying a stake in Saudi Basic Industries Corp., or Sabic, a ...

and more »

New York Post

Fire destroys Gold Pyramid House tourist attraction in Illinois
New York Post
Authorities say fire severely damaged a giant pyramid home that doubles as a tourist attraction in northern Illinois. The Gold Pyramid House was built in 1977 as ...
Fire Damages Giant 'Gold Pyramid' Tourist Attraction in Northern ...Insurance Journal
Giant pyramid tourist attraction burns in northern Illinois | Strange ...Idaho Press-Tribune

all 9 news articles »

YourTango

How To Use The Law Of Attraction To Get Exactly What You Want In Life
YourTango
The Law of Attraction is the belief that you attract things into your life based on whatever vibration you are sending out into the world. And the good news is you can fine tune this vibration with mindfulness exercises to achieve the outcomes and ...


Billy Penn

Philly Taco: A tourist attraction or a real Philadelphia thing?
Billy Penn
I was scrolling through my Twitter timeline one night when I saw something unprecedented. At least, I thought it was unprecedented. A slice of pizza had been wrapped around a cheesesteak, and someone was calling it a “Philly Taco.” Tweet from @ ...


WINA AM 1070

Tiger Woods the main attraction as he rolls back the years
WINA AM 1070
By Martyn Herman. CARNOUSTIE, Scotland (Reuters) – For a few hours at a sun-drenched Carnoustie on Thursday it felt like 2000 all over again, or 2005 or 2006 as Tiger Woods rolled back the years and captivated a heaving British Open gallery.
Tiger Woods continues to be the main attraction as he makes the weekend cut at the Open with another par roundTelegraph.co.uk

all 3,244 news articles »

Meriden Record-Journal

Haunted attraction planned for former Meriden Armory put on hold
Meriden Record-Journal
MERIDEN — A haunted attraction planned for the Meriden Armory has been put on hold due to setbacks in funding and construction. Wayne Barneschi, owner of the Trail of Terror Wallingford, said he wanted to open a haunted attraction called “Armory of ...


NBC 7 San Diego

A Must-See Attraction Outside Comic-Con: 'The Experience' Near Petco Park
NBC 7 San Diego
If you cross the bridge from the convention center and head towards Petco Park, you are in for a treat this year during Comic-Con. 'The Experience' is an interactive, 20 booth attraction featuring everything from Marvel to DC Comics to Ghostbusters to ...

and more »

Q13 FOX

Bellingham Farmer's Market becomes a unique attraction
Q13 FOX
BELLINGHAM – Roslyn McNicholl started Rabbit Fields as a senior project before graduating from Western Washington University. It seems only fitting that she used her college idea to connect with that of fellow WWU students from the 1990's who had a ...

Google News

Use Your Reset Button to Change Your Vibration

At every moment you can tell if the vibration that... Read More

Rising Above the Average

There is nothing more motivating than reading a story about... Read More

The End Of The Road

Last week I was driving along one of the major... Read More

Finding Truth

Why Must We Find Truth:Finding truth can be a very... Read More

Aspirations Worth Their Weight in Platinum

"To succeed, planning alone is insufficient. One must improve as... Read More

What Goes Around, Comes Around

... Read More

Passion Play

I remember a football game from last season when the... Read More

Ego or Higher Self: Whos Behind Your Decisions?

When you make a decision, you hope it is ultimately... Read More

What Next?

When we are faced with making a change we often... Read More

Etch a Sketch or Oil Painting: Where Do You Need to Take a Stand?

Maybe can be a great place. It's full of possibility,... Read More

It Doesnt Take Long To Become An Expert in The Law of Attraction

One of our Faculty, Christine Edick, has been the keynote... Read More

Releasing Your Potential

In life, few people ever step up to live their... Read More

If You Want Others to Like You, Like Yourself First!

Many of us mistakenly believe that it's wrong or conceited,... Read More

Feeding

The purpose of human existence is to send out impulses... Read More

Cop Some Tude!

Do you express your gratitude enough? I know I don't.... Read More

Use Your Vibrations of Energy to Communicate Part 2

"The speed of electromagnetic energy signals is 186,000 miles per... Read More

Dont Be Afraid to Let Other People See Who You Really Are!

Do you know anybody that you consider to be particularly... Read More

Success, Opportunity, Carl, and Kenny G

A couple of weeks ago I celebrated my anniversary by... Read More

Complete Self Acceptance

One of the most important parts of Personal Mastery is... Read More

True Friends Are Not Dream-Slashers

A friendship poem:Choose friends wisely, the portrait they paintIs who... Read More

The Modern Geek - Changing the Stereotype

The day of duck-taped glasses, suspenders and pocket-protectors are quickly... Read More

The Universal Law of Attraction Never, Ever Goes On Strike

There are numerous sources on the store bookshelves and the... Read More

Aspire to Be

Many individuals believe that they have to "live up" to... Read More

Do Your Things Own You?

Do you have things like a bicycle, jetski, or swimming... Read More

The Keys To Faster Evolution

Prosperity is management of positive energy. It's individual capacity to... Read More