Is The Internet A Miracle Cure For Loneliness?

A few years ago a surprising survey discovered that people who spent a lot of time on the Internet were a lot lonelier than people who didn't spend much time on the Net.

This was an unexpected find because many people view the Internet and e-mail as a great way to make and keep connections with other people.

So what is the truth? Does spending time on the Internet actually make people more lonely?

Or did this study simply show that people who are already lonely spend a lot of time on the Net? As happens so often, the technology itself is neutral; whether it is good or bad depends on how the technology is used.

The day can fly by very quickly when you spend time on the Internet, whether you are looking for information, or visiting a chat room. Using the Internet, you can easily find people who share the same obscure interests you may have, such as raising Abyssinian cats, or studying Florentine tapestries.

Through the Internet you can find another person who is struggling with an illness or problem similar to yours, and who understands exactly what you are going through.

The vastness and the speed of the Internet means you can hook up instantly with people on the other side of the world and have lengthy conversations with them about intimate matters you have never discussed with anyone else.

The anonymity of the Internet can be a double-edged sword. You can feel safe revealing your innermost self to a total stranger because he lives five thousand miles away and you will probably never meet him.

You might believe you can tell him your innermost thoughts, even those you can't tell your husband. You may feel encouraged and supported by a person you have met on-line in a way that you don't believe you are supported by any of the people in your everyday life.

Your Internet friends may find it easy to offer you support and encouragement because they will never have to back up their typed words with any real action or commitment. Talk is cheap, and supportive talk on the Internet may or may not be sincerely offered.

It's true that some relationships that start off on the Internet will develop into long term on-line friendships that last decades, even if the two correspondents never meet in person. And in some cases these on-line relationships will also successfully transform into friendships in the off-line world.

But the kind of interaction you get on the Internet lacks some of the most important aspects of a friendship--the interaction with a real live human person. You don't get to experience a friend's face light up with a smile because he is happy to see you. You don't get to take part in shared activities, and develop a history together. You don't have someone put their hand on yours as you exchange confidences.

You don't even know that your Internet friend is really who he claims he is! You don't know beyond a shadow of a doubt that anything your on-line friend says about himself is true.

Although the Internet is a unique and useful means of communication between people, don't use it as a complete substitute for live social contact. Balance your on-line activities with activities that involve meeting and interacting with real live people in your local community.

Don't use the availability and ease of Internet relationships as an excuse to avoid some of the more difficult, yet ultimately more rewarding work of developing relationships with the people you already have around you.

This article is taken from the new book by Royane Real titled "How You Can Have All the Friends You Want - Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends and Keeping Friends" If you want to improve your social life, download it today at

In The News:

This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at


12 Questions People In Polyamorous Relationships Are Sick Of Hearing
“Most polyamorous relationships aren't made up of a hierarchy of 'primary' relationships and 'secondary' relationships. Many polyamorous folks, like myself, have deeply honest relationships with their loved ones that are based on what they actually ...

Financial Times

Beware university reputations tarnished by business links
Financial Times
Business benefits from unblemished academic rigour. The social sciences, under fire for influential studies that cannot be replicated, would benefit from real-world testing. The mutual benefit of clear guidance in these relationships is clear ...

Vilsan '19: Relationships 101 - The Brown Daily Herald
The Brown Daily Herald
Let's talk about relationships. The word has romantic connotations, but in reality, relationships are central to every part of our lives, from the personal to the professional.

and more »

It's All About the Relationships
Modern Distribution Management (blog)
It wasn't that long ago that the personal relationship your outside salesperson had with customers and suppliers was the dominant driver of the business. I've heard or said, “This business is all about relationships” hundreds of times in my ...

Nestle evaluating North America agency relationships - Ad Age
Nestle seeks cost-cutting with new agency structure.

and more »

Duke University considers policy banning all undergraduate-faculty romantic relationships
According to the article, the proposed amendment to the faculty handbook prohibits all undergraduate-faculty sexual and romantic relationships and limits relationships between faculty and graduate students to circumstances where the faculty member does ...


Ahem, Gwyneth Paltrow Says She's In Her First 'Adult Relationship'
The Oscar winner, of course, was famously involved with Pitt and Affleck before her 10-years-plus marriage to Coldplay frontman Martin, which resulted in two children and a “conscious uncoupling.” She announced her engagement to Falchuk in January ...
'I've been in relationships with men who had intimacy issues' - Gwyneth
Gwyneth Paltrow says she's in her first 'adult relationship' with Brad FalchukNew York Daily News
Gwyneth Paltrow Says Brad Falchuk Relationship Is Her First 'Adult ...Entertainment Tonight
Us Weekly -The Times
all 43 news articles »

Business Day

Nkonki network offices end their relationships with Gupta-linked ...
Business Day
The network offices, separate legal entities with different owners, have distanced themselves from the controversy that drove the Sunninghill office to apply for liquidation.

and more »

Elite Daily

What Are Healthy Boundaries To Set In Relationships? 15 People Reveal Their Wisest Guidelines
Elite Daily
There are many keys to a healthy, happy relationship but the most important one of them all is setting boundaries. For example, in my relationship, it's important that the two of us respect each other's privacy. But figuring out what's right for you ...

Google News

Reading Each Others Mind

I cannot tell you how many times I have heard... Read More

My Concept

From my own personal experiences with relationships I believe in... Read More

8 Ways to Improve Your Long Distance Relationship

Couples in love may often find themselves having to live... Read More

Top 10 Ideas to Revive a Fizzling Relationship

Love is exciting, and when a relationship is new, almost... Read More

You Dont Have to Break Down, When You Break Up!

Very few people would argue with the fact that creating... Read More

The Informal Normal In a Black-Tie-Affair World

Have you noticed the trend?You ever notice how on programs... Read More

Rekindling An Old Flame

Dr. Nancy Kalish, a psychology professor at California State University,... Read More

Are You Codependent or Independent?

Why is it that depending on others to fulfill our... Read More

Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places? - How to fine tune your relationship radar

I don't think a week goes by that I don't... Read More

A Look at Interracial Relationships

There's something about America, our history, our values or maybe... Read More

Attraction vs. Love

When we first meet someone, regardless of the way or... Read More

Ounce of Prevention

"To love, honour and cherish", easy words to say during... Read More


Mairi came into my life about two years ago. She... Read More

Why Do Men and Women Misunderstand Each Other So Much

Joke from a Woman to another Woman "Some husbands are... Read More

Zodiac Love Match ? Can the Stars be Right?

As a somewhat older gentleman (but still fairly good looking... Read More

Easy Ways to Turn Any Evening Romantic

If you don't have the time, money or energy to... Read More

Warning Signs He / She May Not Be The One

We've all looked back on past relationships and said, "What... Read More

Tips for Building Love Relationships - 1

Nearly everyone claims to want a great relationship with their... Read More

Love and Life Lessons

Recent events in my life have taught me that the... Read More

Will They or Will They Not Cheat?

Have you ever told your partner or spouse how you... Read More

3 Stone Diamond Rings ? Three Times As Nice!

It is said that the stones in 3 stone diamond... Read More

[Conflict Resolution] The Philosophy of Fear and Confrontation

Is there now, or has there been, a person or... Read More

Love is not Something you Say, Its Something you Do

Many have problems with communication and using that "love" word.... Read More

Proper Flower Etiquette

Flowers are great gifts for practically any occasion, but there... Read More

7 Power Skills that Build Strong Relationships

A strong, healthy relationship is one in which the partners... Read More