Relationship Advice - How to Improve Intimacy

A relationship requires intimacy. I don't think anyone would argue with that. However, what intimacy means to women and what it means to men can be two different things. The ironic thing is, both sexes need intimacy in both of it's forms to have a solid relationship.

When a woman thinks of intimacy, she generally wants to begin with emotional intimacy. Emotional intimacy depends primarily on trust and frequently involves individuals discussing their feelings and emotions with each other in order to gain understanding and offer mutual support. It is necessary for human beings to have this form of intimacy on a regular basis for them to develop and maintain good mental health. When a woman says, 'Let's talk first,' she is not being coy or playing hard to get. A woman needs to feel an emotional bond before sex begins. Ok, I hear you saying, 'Women have sex with strangers, what about that?' Sure, a woman can have sex without the emotional bond, however, for a lasting relationship, this emotional bond must be present. Feeling emotionally attached to your partner takes the physical intimacy to a level that simple sex cannot achieve.

For a man, intimacy generally means physical intimacy. That is how they feel close to their partner. That does not mean they do not have an emotional connection, because for a lasting relationship, this is required. However, aside from sex as simply sex, men also need the physical intimacy to feel loved Sex alone is not enough. The emotional connection must be there for it to be meaningful. Performing without feeling will not meet a man's needs on this level.

Physical intimacy, on the other hand, does not always mean sex. Women generally like to start with hugging, kissing, and other forms of physical intimacy before sex begins. Men also enjoy these things, however, to feel connected to their partner men usually need sex too. Men and women are really looking for the same thing. It is their approach that differs. We all want to feel connected. Women place more importance on the emotional connection and men on the physical, but both are required by everyone. Here are a few suggestions that can make your connection with your partner stronger and build intimacy on every level.

Men, take the time to talk, hold hands, hug, kiss, connect to your women. When she says, 'I'm not in the mood,' it is because you haven't taken the time to do these things. This doesn't mean walk up, say hi, give her a hug and kiss, and start groping. Instead, try this approach, ask her about her day, care about her feelings and discuss them. Hold her hand or put your arm around her as you talk. Give her a hug and kiss here and there without expecting more. When she is talked out, she will usually be as ready for physical intimacy as you are. Discussing your feelings with her will build trust between you and create a strong emotional bond.

Women, if you are in a committed, long-term relationship, understand that men need sex to continue to feel connected to you. Refusing a man is the same thing as a slap in the face. This doesn't mean you have to perform every time he demands it. Far from it. Explain to him what you need to be in the mood for sex. Men do not always understand a women's needs because they have never been told. Often times, once a man understands, he will try to give you what you need. Remember, too long without sex erodes a man's belief that you love him.

Intimacy is one of the most important things in a relationship. Understanding how to meet your partner's needs is the first step in building a strong, long-lasting relationship that both of you will be happy with.

©2005 Patricia Fason

Patricia Fason is a writer and poet whose main focus is relationships. To read more of her work, visit Sites O Web Romances You There you will find relationship articles, poetry, romantic gifts and other tools to keep romance alive in your relationship.

In The News:

This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at https://news.google.com/news

RadioFreeEurope/RadioLiberty

Belarus Calls Same-Sex Relationships 'Fake' After U.K. Raises ...
RadioFreeEurope/RadioLiberty
Belarus calls same-sex relationships “fake” in response to Britain raising a rainbow flag outside its embassy in Minsk.

and more »

U.S. News & World Report

The Power of a Relationship
U.S. News & World Report
"These studies are important because they tell us that teacher-student relationships matter," says Tyrone Howard, a professor of education at the University of California, Los Angeles, who is writing a book on the research about students' relationships ...


New York Times

Review: In the Relationships in 'Singlet,' One and One Make One
New York Times
If these two were any closer, they'd be wearing each other's skin. First seen in silhouette, in profile, the pair of performers who make up the entire cast of Erin Markey's “Singlet,” which runs through June 3 at the Bushwick Starr in Brooklyn, suggest ...


13newsnow.com WVEC

Relationships can crash from 'Love Bombing'
13newsnow.com WVEC
Relationships can crash from 'Love Bombing'. Unable to load video. New relationships can be exciting. Some experts say experiencing high emotions and feelings too quickly could lead to disaster. Published: 11:20 PM EDT May 21, 2018 ...


BBC News

Relationship focus as sex education is overhauled in Wales
BBC News
Children in Wales will be taught what makes healthy relationships and there will be more emphasis on sexuality as part of an overhaul of sex education. Primary and secondary schools will have a statutory duty to cover the issues. Older pupils will have ...
Sex education given LGBT-inclusive overhaul in WalesThe Guardian
Sex and relationships education to be overhauledSouth Wales Argus

all 3 news articles »

Journal Times

Health benefits of grandparent-grandchild relationships
Journal Times
Although a bevy of psychological research focuses on parent-child relationships, new evidence points to the benefits of the grandchild-grandparent relationship as well. Close relationships between these different demographics is often a sign of strong ...


FOX 5 Atlanta

Police building relationships through basketball
FOX 5 Atlanta
The teens are part of the Police Athletic League Midnight basketball program in Cobb County. It was the final game when they got the chance to play against the cops. But it's more than just a basketball game. It's about forming bonds, developing ...


The Missoulian

National Foster Care Month: 'Relationships ... heal their hurts' | Local ...
The Missoulian
Tim and Tracy Worley hold a pink, fuzzy bear aptly named Pink. The small bear was given to their foster son when he was very young, possibly during a stay.
Fostering Fortnight – Relationships that can last a lifetimeLondon News Online (blog)

all 28 news articles »

Teachers' work ability: a study of relationships between collective efficacy and self-efficacy beliefs
Dove Medical Press
Gloria Guidetti,1 Sara Viotti,1 Andreina Bruno,2 Daniela Converso1 1Department of Psychology, University of Turin, Turin, Italy; 2Department of Education Science, University of Genoa, Genoa, Italy Introduction: Work ability constitutes one of the most ...


WPSD Local 6

Front Line of Safety: How school officials are building relationships to protect students
WPSD Local 6
LYON COUNTY, KY — When you send your child to school, you expect them to have their books, notebooks, and a backpack —not weapons and drugs. Do you know what kids may secretly be carrying down those halls? It's the job of Lyon County Sheriff's ...

Google News

What Men Want From Women

Actually, it's pretty simple. Deep inside the heart of every... Read More

Reading Each Others Mind

I cannot tell you how many times I have heard... Read More

Honesty Accepted - Deception Denied

We've all done it at one time or another, or... Read More

Confession of the Egoists!

Hamlet has given this generation an awfully amazing and defensive... Read More

Rescue and Rebuild Your Relationship: 7 Tips to Make it Work

Create Time To Share And Time On Your Own.Establish time... Read More

Are You Codependent or Independent?

Why is it that depending on others to fulfill our... Read More

Relationship Advice: 5 Tips to Make a Strong Marriage Even Better

1. Time together is time during which the complete focus... Read More

I Love You!

The famous three words we never hear enough of in... Read More

Being A Friend Through A Divorce

We used to joke amongst the couples we are close... Read More

Your Relationships Begin With You

As a single male in my mid-twenties, I find myself... Read More

Relationship Advice: 4 Ways to Handle an Unsolvable Relationship Problem

1) Leave the relationshipThis is the most common alternative chosen,... Read More

How to Get a Woman to Treat You the Way You Deserve

You know the scenario. You start dating a woman. After... Read More

Hunter and Gatherer

Deep down, we haven't evolved as much as we would... Read More

Lobster - The Food Of Romantics

Summer has arrived! Woo-Hoo! Do you know what always comes... Read More

A Diamond Anniversary Ring ? The Perfect Way To Seal Your Love

Some time ago you both made a promise. A promise... Read More

How to Start a Conversation With a Woman

Last week I had the easiest pick up and seduction... Read More

Infidelity: Spying is NOT Revenge

Do not use what you find on your cheating spouse... Read More

Great Relationship Advice: The Ability to Communicate

In my workshops with couples, I start with this question:"How... Read More

Relationship Advice - How to Improve Intimacy

A relationship requires intimacy. I don't think anyone would argue... Read More

Spouse Improvement: Influence Your Partner to Change in Just 7 Steps

Everyone has something they'd like to change in their partner.... Read More

Relationship Conflict - Blow Up or Blow Through

Every now and then I hear a "relationship expert" say... Read More

Relationship Advice for Women - Beyond the Happy Ending - Part 2 The Not-the-Same Syndrome

How often do we complain that our man isn't romantic... Read More

10 Clues of an Online Affair

1. Your spouse or partner spends excess time on-line. Who... Read More

Ive Gotta Hand It to You

What would I do without my wife? Not much. What... Read More

5 Ways to Tell Your Man You Love Him

Telling your man that you love him is part of... Read More