Letting Go Of Wanting Your Own Approval

Ever had a time in your life when those closest to you disapproved of your behavior? It is very uncomfortable is it not? In a moment, peace of mind can vanish in a puff of smoke and you crave approval more than anything else. This time in the wilderness seems to last forever and when it is finally over the newly earned approval of your peers feels just great.

This wanting approval can get out of control though. We can easily extend this need for approval to all people we come into contact with in our life. When we want and need approval we encounter this lack of approval everywhere we go; the waiter does not smile when he takes your order; the checkout operator hardly looks at you; and your boss only compliments your work when the moon is full and the first Tuesday of the month precedes a wet weekend!

All of a sudden life is a struggle, a constant battle to get other people, all people, to like you and to approve of you. And the more you want this approval the less you seem to get it.

What is the solution? The answer is to not be concerned about what other people think of you. This can be achieved by approving of yourself completely despite your past indiscretions, failings and errors of judgment. When you totally accept and approve of yourself you will have little interest in how other people view you. If they like you *Great*, if they do not, that is their choice and their loss.

There are many ways to boost your opinion of yourself. I recently discovered that just letting go of wanting your own approval works really well. Simply ask yourself the following question:

Could I let go of wanting my own approval?

Sounds too simple to work. I know! It works if and only if you ask the question with your attention on your feeling response not on the answer that pops into your head. Our goal is to let go of the limiting feelings, this is not a mental exercise.

Spend twenty minutes concentrating on this question. Ask the question again and again, and each time just notice your feeling response before asking the question again. After twenty minutes you can expect to feel lighter and more at peace with yourself. Your breathing may also change and it is likely to become deeper and more relaxed.

The effect of letting go of wanting your approval is that you release the limitations that stop you from approving of yourself and you are left with what you wanted - your own approval.

You can also ask yourself the question, could I let go of wanting my own approval?... anytime you need to communicate at your best to make a good impression. Just say it softly to yourself under your breath or quietly inside your head. Ask the question, notice your feeling response, and repeat the process again and again.

By approving completely of yourself you will not be concerned with winning the approval of your listeners and ironically people will tend to reflect this approval back to you since they will take you at your own value.

Now, go and prove this for yourself!

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert and published author. Subscribe FREE to his upbeat newsletter and get a FREE e-book, which reveals secret strategies for supercharging your communication skills. To join send an email to: [email protected]< br> http://www.topica.com/lists/AbolishShynessTo day/

In The News:

Hellwig Hollow Haunted Attraction  perfectduluthday.com
Van Der Waals Attraction and Hydrogen Bonding  The Great Courses Daily News

Attract Your Ideal Relationship Using the Law of Attraction

First, I'll need to explain what Law of Attraction is... Read More

Part II--The Journey to a State Called Authentic

Are you on the road yet? If not, pony up... Read More

Freedom of Choice -- Learning to Make the Right Choices

Recognizing your gift of choice is liberating. This means acknowledging... Read More

The Universal Law of Attraction Never, Ever Goes On Strike

There are numerous sources on the store bookshelves and the... Read More

Break the Cycle

The other day I was walking out of a store... Read More

Basic Intuitive Timing for Business and Life

"There is a tide in the affairs of men, which... Read More

Awaken The Genie Within

Ancient lore tells us that there's a magical genie who... Read More

Closing the Feedback Loop

In earlier articles, I've often spoken about the supreme importance... Read More

Is There Something Called Free Will

The statement ""The concept of free will is a fallacy""... Read More

Visualization: Attracting Your Dreams and Desires

Visualization is an essential tool for attracting your dreams and... Read More

Purpose of Choice

Tornadic weather threatens southeastern Colorado and life on the plains... Read More

Making New Friends

How do we make friends? More importantly if dropped into... Read More

The Take-off!

"I just can't start a conversation with women, and it's... Read More

What Is Your Legacy?

During a recent speech, I told the audience that my... Read More

Are You Irresistibly Attractive?

If you've done any reading on the subject of marketing,... Read More

Do Your Things Own You?

Do you have things like a bicycle, jetski, or swimming... Read More

Does Size Matter?

Bigger is better. Isn't that the American dream?Why buy a... Read More

Success Through Authenticity: Harness Your ?Innie? Natural Edge

For any inner-directed individual, much of life feels like you... Read More

Dont Be Afraid to Let Other People See Who You Really Are!

Do you know anybody that you consider to be particularly... Read More

It Doesnt Take Long To Become An Expert in The Law of Attraction

One of our Faculty, Christine Edick, has been the keynote... Read More

Change Your Story; Change Your Life

When was the last time you told someone the story... Read More

Are You The Worlds Expert On Yourself?

Congratulations! You are the world's expert.That's right: you are the... Read More

Harvest Moon Lessons

The full moon in September is often bigger and brighter... Read More

What the Samurai Can Teach Us About Self-Improvement

A Seventeenth Century Samurai maxim states:"A man who has attained... Read More

Gratitude: 11 Universal Laws for ThanksLiving

The Law of ThanksgivingIt's easy to be grateful around the... Read More