How to let go of your EGO

When does your ego get in the way?

Let's go back to that networking meeting and scan the room again. Have you seen the person that never stops talking? He is the one that is talking about how great his business is and how great his services are. He even gets bold enough to take your card and to try and set an appointment with you to sell his services. This is the person that has placed their ego in front and even though they are enthusiastic about what they do, they are also enthusiastic about hearing themselves talk. They have not spent anytime listening to what others have to offer, nor have they asked any questions. This is the person where you cannot get a word in edgewise and if you do, the subject always turns back to themselves. You do not need to avoid such a person, but you must in some manner help them drop the ego and get on with what they came for, to network.

If you spend more time listening than talking, then you will get further with business relationships, but do not let the person talking the entire time take the floor. After all, they are not talking about what they need in the way of services and products to move their business forward, they are simply pushing themselves. If you are to be successful in gaining some business relationships, and you should always try to develop at least one at each event, then listen to what others say and encourage them to talk about their business concerns. You must put your best foot forward at all times and listen to the needs of others. If you can offer a solution and setup a further meeting for additional discussion, then you are much further ahead. The goal is to gain a business relationship, not to sell your services.

Business relationships can be fairly easy to form if you do not spend your time selling yourself at an event. Yes, others will want to know what you have to offer and how you fit, but the goal is to start a relationship.

Bette Daoust, Ph.D. has been networking with others since leaving high school years ago. Realizing that no one really cared about what she did in life unless she had someone to tell and excite. She decided to find the best ways to get people's attention, be creative in how she presented herself and products, getting people to know who she was, and being visible all the time. Her friends and colleagues have often dubbed her the "Networking Queen". Blueprint for Networking Success: 150 ways to promote yourself is the first in this series. Blueprint for Branding Yourself: Another 150 ways to promote yourself is planned for release in 2005. For more information visit

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