Maria?s New Lifestyle: Short Story About The Benefits Shopping On The Net Has Given

I've got this strange friend; her name is Maria. Maria's always been a little weird but now things have gotten unworldly altogether. You see, Maria's an artist; she's into sculpture in particular, of which she specializes in the manipulation of Perspex with a blowtorch. Lately I haven't seen too much of her as she's hooked up the Internet. Actually not many people at all have seen her recently; she says she's working on a big project.

Now that she's got the Internet she reckons she can focus a lot more on her work without distractions. She doesn't 'waste' time doing grocery shopping anymore. Now she orders all her food and household items. She says if she's extremely busy, her weekly list is saved into the computer, and she just clicks on 'order' and the usual stuff is delivered to her door every week. No more driving, parking, searching for stuff, standing in line, dealing with bored and under slept cashiers. I'm starting to think it's not such a bad idea. Maria is pretty proud. She's now organizing for a local greengrocer to deliver her fruit and vegetables too.

Maria has always had a 'thing' for Donald Duck. On the Net she's found all these rare collectable dealers like Ebay. When she's not warping Perspex into postmodern configurations representing the need for a more spiritual existence, she's thriving in the consumerist world of finding and bidding for Donald Duck comic books from the 1950's. Last I heard a friend said she's actually starting to look like a duck herself!

All this Internet shopping is pretty new to me, it sounds like it really could help a lot of people out. However for recluse artists it could be the final straw for friends and family who may never see their buddies again! Nah, its cool-I just hope Maria's new project isn't a giant Perspex Donald Duck. I don't think the world needs any more Donald Ducks!

I just got back from Maria's place. You're not going to believe what I saw. She was actually having a party, and I wasn't invited. Maybe she thinks I'm boring compared to her new friends. She says she met them on the Internet, a whole bunch of people into Donald Duck! One guy was actually dressed up like Yosemite Sam-gun belt and all! It seems I'm the odd one out.

Before I left her place she showed me her new sculpture. I underestimated her newfound love. It's a giant computer; inside it is filled with the heads of all her friends (me included). Of course none of us had human mouths, smiling duck beaks adorned all the heads, a definite sign of the Internet's powerful influence, and of the collective warping of today's society!

About The Author

Jesse S. Somer is a human hoping to show his fellow Earth citizens the beautiful opportunities the Internet is making available for all our lives.

M6.Net http://www.m6.net

[email protected]

In The News:

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Collection of 3 Shelby Cobras sold for millions at auction  Fox NewsA trio of Shelby Cobras sold for a combined $7 million this past weekend. The cars were from the estate of noted collector Steven Juliano, who died from ...
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Rare Dodo Skeleton May Fetch Over $700K at Auction  Live ScienceYou may have heard of the hapless dodo — an endearingly squat, toddler-size flightless bird — that was driven to extinction in the late 1600s and hasn't been ...
Bring a Trailer Goes Posh as Auction Site Starts “White Glove” Service by Selling Its Own Mercedes Gullwing at No Reserve  Car and DriverPristine 1965 Mercedes-Benz 300SL Gullwing heads to auction to commemorate Bring a Trailer's new Plus and White Glove services.
Kurt Cobain's Used Paper Plate Sold At California Auction  NPRThe Nirvana frontman was eating pizza before a 1990 show in Washington, D.C., and he needed to write down his set list on. He grabbed his plate and listed the ...
Portugal to launch second 700 MW solar auction in January  pv magazine InternationalWhile preparing for the country's first, 1.35 GW solar tender in June, state secretary for energy João Galamba has revealed another procurement exercise will be ...
Tulsa cattle auction report | Markets  High Plains JournalThe Tulsa Livestock Auction, Tulsa, Oklahoma, reported 1939 head of cattle selling May 20, compared to 1549 head selling a week ago and 2317 a year ago, ...
Spectrum auction, 5G trials top Telecom Ministry agenda for new government  LivemintNew Delhi: Preparing the Cabinet note for spectrum auction, rolling out of the new digital communications policy and establishing regulatory sandboxes, 5G ...
Pair of Yubari melons fetch record ¥5 million at season's first auction in Hokkaido  The Japan TimesA pair of specially grown hybrid melons cultivated in the city of Yubari, Hokkaido, fetched a record ¥5 million ($45500) on Friday in the season's first a.
Customs auctions vehicles to 'raise money for the state'  The Daily StarLebanese Customs held its second auction of abandoned goods at Beirut Port in an effort to “raise money for the state,” agency head Badri Daher said Sunday.
Traders withdraw tea from auction as price falls  Business DailyHuge volumes of tea were withdrawn from the auction last week.
Here’s What to Expect at the $1.3 Billion Spring Auctions in New York, From a $58 Million Koons to a Once-Lost Cézanne  artnet NewsHere are all the highlights at the Impressionist, modern, and contemporary art auctions in New York next week.
Ex-library Harry Potter book predicted to sell for £30,000 at auction  Independent.ieA first edition Harry Potter book is set to sell for around £30000 at auction, despite signs of wear and tear.
Vocus board considers auction as takeover approaches fly in  The Australian Financial ReviewTelecommunications company Vocus Group has received a number of takeover approaches and its board is considering whether to run a formal sale process, ...
This massive Long Island land auction could bring in $34M  The Real DealAn auction later this month will seek to sell more than 230 mostly residential parcels in Suffolk County.
One Lousy Treasury Bond Auction Doesn’t Say Anything  BloombergThe U.S. Treasury Department sold $27 billion of 10-year notes on Wednesday, and by one important metric, it drew the lowest demand in a decade.

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