Need To Stop Worrying?

I once worked with a woman whose zest,joy and enthusiasm lit up the room [and it was a big office!]

I remarked that it was lovely that she was always such uplifting company.

"Oh,I wasn't always like this", she replied. "It all changed when my dad died, when I was about forty."

"Was he that bad?" I asked her.

"On the contray," she told me "he was wonderful." However, just before he died he made a confession:

"Darling, I have ruined my life with worry. And not one thing I've worried about has ever happened! Don't let the same thing happen to you!"

Something "clicked" within her. And she kicked her worry habit from then on!

If you need something to 'click' to stop you worrying I hope the following helps:

Often when a worry 'pops in' the normal reaction is to try and solve it. This is fine if there is something tangible that can be done right now. However, many worries are either entirely imaginary, or a small 'problem' is blown out of all proportion.

So what happens is that you try to 'solve' what doesn't exist. The more you try and solve it the worse the 'problem' gets.

A wise old woman once said to me "Why are you worrying what you're going to say to so and so a week on Monday? You'll be there, you'll know!"

Lets take an imaginary, but common, example:

Miss Anxious starts worrying that she may lose her job. She tries to solve this imaginary 'problem' by looking for a new job. But if she can't get another one, she'll have to sell the house. And if it doesn't sell and she can't afford the mortgage payements....and so on, until she's pushing a shopping cart, containing all her belongings, around the streets...

In reality Miss Anxious is lying on a lovely beach 'enjoying' a well earned break from a hectic career!

By the way, her boss finds her invaluable.

A very effective way to 'solve' this sort of imaginary worrying is to let the thought be there, but not trying to 'solve' it.

This may sound simple, but it's very powerful. It's common to get worries popping into our minds. They are often nothing, just bits of nonsense. Not worth our attention. Trying to push them away or solve them can make them into monsters.

Just let them be, until they leave on their own. And they will. If another 'worry' takes its place, treat it in the same way.

Miss Anxious has just read this and now she's enjoying her well earned holiday. Somewhere there's a slightly worrying thought at the edge of her mind. But she's giving most of her attention to the wonderful present moment.

Enjoy your present moment, be in the now, and everything will take care of itself.

Janet trained as a stress management consultant. She owns the website http://www.womens-natural-health.com where you'll find lots of free tips for enhancing your health and happiness.

In The News:

Stress: what it is and how to deal with it  Chartered Management Institute
Event Calendar April 12 - April 16  CMU The Tartan Online
Stress Management for Nurses  www.oncnursingnews.com/
More Than a Murder-Suicide  Psychiatric Times
Springing hope in your step  Portugal Resident

8 Practical Methods to Remain Empowered During Stressful Times

1. Acknowledge that requesting support, guidance and partnership is not... Read More

High Stress Means Low Self Esteem

Do you have the desire for a stress free life?... Read More

Stress and Your Immune System: 10 Ways to Relax and Rejuvenate

Stress seems to have become a constant factor in today's... Read More

Stress Management: How to Change Limiting Beliefs

Mark Twain once said, "It's not what we don't know... Read More

Stress Management and Mastery: 3 Steps to Loving What You Do

My first real job (schedule, time clock, paycheck, boss) was... Read More

The Cost of Stress ? the Need to Monitor and Manage the Risks!

How much attention is paid to one of the biggest... Read More

How To Avoid Stress By Staying in The Present Moment

The future is nothing but a fantasy or a daydream,... Read More

Stress Management and Mastery: Frustration or Fascination

"Learn how to turn frustration into fascination. You will learn... Read More

Stress Management: Have To Vs. Get To

File this one under the category of "watch your language."The... Read More

Everything You Always Wanted to Know About How to Get a Life, But Didnt Know Whom to Ask

Question 1"How do I get more time to play?"Answer: Schedule... Read More

Stress Management and Mastery: Breakdown or Breakthrough?

Q: "My career, though very very stressful, is one that... Read More

Managing Stress From Another World

Modern stress is habitual, and is something that the vast... Read More

Stress in the Workplace

Why are you so busy? Do you really have too... Read More

Taming September: Avoiding Fall Frenzy

When September rolls around, does it generally hit you like... Read More

Self-Healing Basics

* The material presented in this article is provided for... Read More

Stress Management: Medical Risks of Stress

What is Stress?Stress may be defined as the three-way relationship... Read More

Quick Steps On Handling Stress

Looking for some quick stress relief?Edward W. Smith, motivational speaker,... Read More

The Jerk is Never Me

Comedian George Carlin once remarked, "Have your ever noticed? Anyone... Read More

Rising to the Top: Overcoming Bad Situations

We've all been there, right? We find ourselves living with... Read More

Stress is a Killer?Will it get YOU?

What good is Personal or Business Success...if your Health is... Read More

Treat Your Anxiety Disorder Effectively

If you find symptoms of anxiety disorder in any of... Read More

Life Happens

Shit happens. I know this to be a fact, because... Read More

Anger Management: Is It Finally Time To Forgive?

In order to free ourselves from the pain of anger... Read More

Is Worry Necessary?

Who hasn't experienced "worry" at one time or another? Almost... Read More

Stress Management: How to Take Off Those Masks We Wear

The Mask of "I've Got It All Together"It's so easy... Read More