Conflict Resolution ... What The Heck Are You Thinking?

Do you get frustrated with your spouse, your kids, your parents? Maybe you can't stand your boss, or your co-workers drive you up the wall. I'll bet you think that if all these pesky people would just quit bothering you that you'd be really happy, right? Well guess what, you'd just find something else to drive you crazy because you like how it feels.

You THINK you don't want to feel upset or frustrated, but really, it is your THOUGHTS that are causing you pain, not the feelings. Try this. The next time you find yourself upset about something, STOP THINKING. Just stop the head for a minute and feel what is going on inside your body. Feel your heart rate, notice your breathing, pay attention where your body feels tight. STOP THINKING! Maybe you'll notice that your heart is racing, your breath is shallow, and your stomach is clenched.

Now think of a time when you had these same physical sensations but you were in a "happy place." Perhaps you were having an amorous evening with your significant other, or you were at a sporting event and cheering on your winning team, or you were anxiously awaiting the surprise guest of honor at a party. You experience that same exhilarating feeling in both Joy and Conflict.

If you want to have fewer conflicts in your life, you can start by admitting that you like that stimulating feeling you get when you're frustrated. Try this the next time you're sitting there, stewing in your own juices because "someone" ticked you off:

1. STOP THINKING ... Put all of your excuses, arguments, and validations on hold.

2. FEEL THE FEELING ... What are your physical sensations?

3. REMEMBER ... When have you enjoyed this same physical feeling in the past?

4. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY ... You wanted to feel exhilaration and you got it. Now own it.

Once you take responsibility, you'll see that it's pointless to blame others when you get upset, frustrated, and angry. The truth is, you're really getting a kick out of it. After you've followed this sequence a few times, you'll discover a knee-jerk reaction to conflict that will remind you that you got frustrated just so you could feel the excitement.

5. LAUGH ... Don't take yourself so seriously. It's actually kinda funny.

If frustration and conflict work for you, then by all means, don't try this. Just keep doing what you're doing, and you'll keep getting what you've always gotten. I promise, this will only work if you practice it. Once you've tried this suggestion a few times, you'll discover that your THINKING is causing your conflicts and you'll realize just how silly that is.

"There is nothing either bad or good, but thinking makes it so." --William Shakespeare

©Dawn Breeze-George. Reprint rights granted with article and resource box intact.

Support your Health and Energy level while you are evolving into a Joyful person with Original Noni Juice from Tahiti: http://www.nonijuice.bravehost.com Register here to win a FREE trip to Tahiti!

Dawn Breeze-George is a Licensed Massage Therapist, Reiki Master and Holistic Practitioner. Dawn has been practicing Holistic healing for more than 18 years, and is committed to healing the body, mind, and spirit. See my story at: http://www.nonijuice.bravehost.com/dawn.html

In The News:

Stress Management  Penn: Office of University Communications
Three ways to improve your self-care routine  Santa Clarita Valley Signal
How should kids manage stress  Stock News Brief
Stress management tips for anxious attorneys  North Carolina Lawyers Weekly
Mindfulness can reduce opioid yearnings, finds new study  International Business Times, Singapore Edition
Five signs you may be living with anxiety  The Australian Financial Review

Stress Management: 7 Universal Laws for Managing Change

1. The Law of StagnationThis is also known as first... Read More

How to Cope With Stress and Strain

Work related tensions, personal issues and abnormal lifestyles are the... Read More

Stress & Self Esteem: Raising One by Lowering the Other

In our article about Exercise & Stress, we looked at... Read More

When Dreams Get Shattered: Picking Up the Pieces

"Smash!" It was a sunny autumn Saturday. My cousins and... Read More

Stress Relief

Traffic jams. Toddler tantrums. Deadlines at work. Money troubles. Too... Read More

7 Tips to Help You De-stress & Handle Your Problems

Life would be so wonderful if it weren't for other... Read More

Stress Management: Declare Your Freedom To........................

1) Create the life you desireTwo of our most underdeveloped... Read More

Stress Tips

26 ways to minimize and manage the unhealthy effects of... Read More

Stress Elimination

Learning methods of stress elimination is a vital skill in... Read More

Empowerment for Highly Sensitive People: Part 1

Are you a person who has a keen imagination, a... Read More

Haris Stress Inventory

Conceptualizing stress: Stress often has a negative connotation. Failure, illnesses,... Read More

Build Your Stress Tolerance

While free-lancing for business magazines, I was assigned to write... Read More

Through Stress Comes Kindness

In these times when companies are constantly down-sizing and right-sizing... Read More

Control Stress with High Morale

When Army leaders fail to control battlefield stress, they lose... Read More

HELP! Im Working with a Baby!!

Did you know that more than half of our adult... Read More

The 3 Rs of Taking a Vacation Without Leaving Home

This summer, get away, without going away. Take a mini... Read More

What The Most Dangerous Job In The World Taught Me About Coping With Stress

I just got through reading some troubling news in the... Read More

Conquer Stress and Anxiety Naturally With This Safe and Effective Method

Rhodiola Rosea is the latest natural remedy to join the... Read More

Minimize Stress in Your Life

Use these simple tips to minimize stress in your day... Read More

Are You Worried? 4 Steps to Peace of Mind

A friend has this quotation on his office wall: "I... Read More

Overwhelm: Love It or Leave It!

Amazing thing, overwhelm!You don't usually see it coming. It just... Read More

The Best Medicine For Stress ( A Daily Dose Of Gratitude)

There is one sure fire medicine that cures all difficulty... Read More

How to Cope When Things Go Wrong

There are times in every person's life when things do... Read More

Three Tips for Forgiveness: A Key Factor in Anger Management

Elizabeth, 32, cried during anger management class as she told... Read More

Social Phobia

Imagine going through your whole life in the constant fear... Read More