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Tax Jokes and Quotes

Tax Jokes and Quotes

Do you realize that some tax forms ask you to check a box if you are BLIND?

Quote: "Two years ago it was impossible to get through on the phone to the IRS. Now it's just hard to get through. That's progress." -Charles Rossotti, former IRS Commissioner

Disappointed that you never had time to write the great American novel? Don't fret, just go dig out your past tax returns.

Quote: "The Eiffel Tower is the Empire State Building after taxes."

Under the Freedom of Information Act, a man with a small business sent a request to the IRS asking if they had a file on him. The IRS wrote back, "There is now."

Quote: "It would be nice if we could all pay our taxes with a smile, but normally cash is required."

Q: Who audits IRS agents?

Quote: "Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite as satisfying as an income tax refund."

Q: How do you drive a CPA insane?

A: Fill out Form 1040EZ.

Quote: "The government deficit is the difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect."

Why is it that when the IRS loses a tax return, it is considered a mistake, but when you lose a receipt, it is considered tax evasion?

Quote: "The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling."

Q: How do you humble a person that flaunts their wealth?

A: Have them fill out a tax return.

Quote: "Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr."

Q: Why is a tax audit like a tornado?

A: There's a lot of screaming and you end up losing your house.

Quote: "When are we going to be allowed to list the government as a dependent?"

People often say death and taxes are the same, but this is wrong. Death is a taxable event, but taxes never die.

Richard Chapo is CEO of http://www.businesstaxrecovery.com - Obtaining tax refunds for small businesses by finding overlooked tax deductions and credits through a free tax return review.

In The News:

Government further extends tax compliance deadlines. Check the new dates here Economic TimesCentre gives more time for income tax filings, investments for FY20 LivemintYou may invest till July 31 to save taxes for FY 2019-20 and to keep PPF, SSY, NSC accounts active The Financial ExpressAmid Covid-19 pandemic, Centre extends time limits for tax compliances Hindustan TimesGovt extends tax compliance deadlines, here are the new dates CNBCTV18View Full coverage on Google News

Taxes need to be simplified for a self-reliant India: Nirmala Sitharaman Livemint

Income Tax department extends five new deadlines for Indian taxpayerss Business Standard

Saudi shoppers rush to buy gold before taxes triple Economic Times

2020 tax deadline is around the corner. Here are 4 tips for filing by July 15 USA TODAY

Tax Alert! Haven’t paid your advance tax yet? Pay it today to avail this benefit The Financial Express

Taxpayer Alert! 5 changes in income tax, personal finance rules effective from July 1 The Financial Express

GST investigation arm unearths Rs 40 cr tax evasion by pan masala/gutkha mfg unit Economic Times

GST @3: Goods and Service Tax regime completes 3 years Economic Times

Why filing your property tax online can be taxing Livemint

New income tax slab: You can now claim exemption on conveyance, travel allowance Livemint